A Risk Worth Taking
by FaithinBones
Summary: Bones Season 10 shown from Brennan's point of view
1. Chapter 1

(Season 10)

A/N: This story is the idea of Lauwy. I started to write it last year, but my mother had surgery and my life got a little more hectic, between work, trying to keep up her house and mine and helping her with baths when I got home each evening. I looked it over and finished writing it last Saturday. This story is four chapters long. I plan to post each chapter in the next four days.

I don't own Bones.

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Worried about the changes in Booth, Brennan sought out their younger friend, Lance Sweets. Her husband seemed to be off kilter, obsessed and volatile in a way she had never seen before. She needed help to understand what was going on.

"Booth is driven by his belief in honesty, in honor and service." Sweets had also noticed the changes in his friend and he too was worried. "Now, Booth's beliefs have been betrayed by the organization that he trusted, that he served."

She hesitated to say it, but Brennan didn't know how else to explain the changes in Booth. "It . . . it's as if someone died . . . it's like Booth died." Her voice was so soft, but conveyed so much pain.

The psychologist in Sweets knew exactly what Brennan was saying to him and it made him sad to confirm her fears. "In a sense, he has you know? He . . . he doesn't have an anchor."

His refusal to pray, to wear his St. Christopher medal, his failure to attend church had been the first thing Brennan had noticed about Booth when he returned home. It was completely out of character and since Booth was a man of faith, it worried her that he was displaying disinterest in his own faith. "Faith in something greater than himself." She wasn't sure if Sweets was talking about religious faith or faith in his government, but at this point she felt that the lack of faith was dangerous.

"That's good." Sweets was surprised that Brennan had picked up on Booth's biggest problem. She was always saying that she was clueless about verbal clues and body language and yet here she had picked up on Booth's lack of faith. "Watch out or you'll turn into a psychologist . . . Look, Booth is afraid of trusting again . . . it's natural. We just need to show him it's a risk worth taking."

Brennan knew now that Sweets was talking about faith in the people around Booth, but she knew her husband's loss was deeper than that. If he had lost his faith in his God then Booth was lost and she needed to help him to find himself before he was irrevocably changed.

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The first time she met Special Agent James Aubrey, Brennan had been impressed with his confidence, his professionalism and his willingness to help Booth. The younger agent was working with Sweets to help Booth with their case. While they worked the case it had taken odd and terrifying twists and turns. Starting with the death of Wesley Foster, they had worked their way through evidence that led them to someone in the EPA named Howard Cooper who supposedly had died of leukemia, but who had actually been murdered with an injected toxin. That death had led them eventually to Hugo Sanderson who had been set up as a patsy by Dr. Glen Durant.

Durant was later revealed to be the head of an organization bent on bending the government to a set of beliefs that could be traced back to Herbert Hoover, the former and deceased Director of the FBI and those beliefs were grotesque to both Booth and Brennan. Durant had been raised by a step-father who had worshiped Hoover and his twisted beliefs. That beloved step-father had passed down those beliefs to the doctor as well as Hoover's secret files and those files had let Durant gain control of many powerful people around the country.

Hoover had believed that the Founding Fathers had disdained democracy and that the country should be ruled by the educated elite and property owners. In turn Durant believed the same things. He felt that the masses were merely mob rule and allowing them a say in government was anathema to the doctor. He had used the records that Hoover had accumulated over the years and had blackmailed as many government officials that he could to influence how the government was run. In essence he was the man behind the curtain, an evil twisted version of the Wizard of Oz.

Before they had finally found the proof to arrest Durant for treason and murder, Lance Sweets had been murdered. It was Agent Aubrey who found the profiler dying on a parking garage floor and let Booth and Brennan know so they could be with their friend at the end of his life. It was a hard loss for both of them and Booth had completely gone off the rails for a short while. He had contemplated the murder of Hugo Sanderson and if Brennan hadn't confronted her husband, the mourning agent would have probably committed cold blooded murder. Brennan had never been so afraid and so furious. She needed Booth to be Booth and he wasn't acting like the man she had fallen in love with. It had been a truly terrifying time in her life.

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After the wake for Sweets in the park, Brennan had found that she needed to talk to someone about her husband and though she felt like it was a betrayal to Booth, she chose to talk to Aubrey anyway. They met at a small coffee shop several miles from the Lab and the Hoover. Brennan chose it because as far as she knew, Booth never bought coffee from that shop. "Booth needs a partner."

Famished, Aubrey bit into his piece of banana coffee cake and chewed it slowly. His thoughts organized, he swallowed and grimly nodded his head. "Yeah, but your husband doesn't want a partner. I don't think he even likes me . . . Deputy Director Stark has assigned me to Major Crimes and he wants me to find a way to get Booth to accept me as a partner, but I think it's going to be a tough sell."

"Yes, it will be." Brennan sipped her coffee and was careful with her next words. "My husband had lost his ability to trust. Right now I am the only one he truly trusts. He has some faith in Dr. Saroyan, Dr. Hodgins and Angela Montenegro and of course Caroline Julian, but not total faith. He is . . . he is lost at the moment . . . of course you know I don't mean physically lost, but mentally lost, spiritually lost."

Slightly amused, Aubrey realized that the gossip he had heard about Brennan was true. She was a very literal person and it was fascinating. "Stark thinks I can learn a lot from your husband. Booth is considered to be a great investigator and his solve rate . . . with the help of you and the Jeffersonian . . . well that solve rate is mind boggling. I do want to be his partner, but I don't know if Booth is going to let me."

Her sigh betrayed her thoughts and Brennan knew it. "Prison had changed Booth and he has lost his confidence in everyone at the Hoover and at the Justice Department. It will be hard to get him to accept you, but if you persevere I think you may be able to sway him eventually. My husband values loyalty and trustworthiness. He himself is very loyal to those he believes deserves that loyalty. I don't think that has changed in him and it is a way to sway him. You will have to work hard, but I think you can succeed."

"I hope so." Aubrey sipped some of his coffee and thought about what he needed to do to get Booth to trust him. "Like I said, Deputy Director Stark wants me to be Booth's partner and now that I know you do too, maybe between the both of us, we can make that happen." _At least I hope so._

"I will try to influence him to the best of my ability." Brennan was concerned that Booth wouldn't be receptive to a partnership with Aubrey, but at this point she knew it had to be done. She couldn't be in the field all of the time. Concerned for her daughter's future, she wanted to lessen the possibility that both she and Booth would be killed leaving their daughter an orphan. Brennan was willing to go into the field, but some of the more dangerous aspects of the job needed to be taken up by Aubrey or someone like Aubrey. "You will need to be patient."

"Yeah." He had a plan and he thought it might work. "The next case you get, I'm going to try to be part of the investigation. I'm sure Booth is going to balk, but I think I can make it work. It's worth a shot anyway."

Pleased that Aubrey was at least willing to try, she hoped he had a thick skin because Booth could be very abrasive when he took a dislike to someone or a situation. "My husband is going to be very displeased with your plan, but like you say, it is worth a shot." Normally she didn't understand colloquialisms, but this phrase had been used by Booth numerous times over the years and she knew exactly what Aubrey meant.

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The purpose of this story is to show you part of season 10 from Brennan's point of view. This is a companion story to 'A Thankless Job'. That story was written from Aubrey's and Booth's point of view. Let me know what you think of it. Thank you.


	2. Chapter 2

(Season 10)

Thank you for reviewing my story. I appreciate.

I really don't own Bones.

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Stark had been blunt and to the point which Brennan appreciated. Too many times she found that people beat around the proverbial bush and refused to come to the point in a timely fashion which she found very annoying. Deputy Director Stark had confronted Brennan in the Hoover parking garage and spoke clearly and precisely. He wanted Booth to accept James Aubrey as his partner and he wanted it done quickly. The man had approached Booth and told him that it was necessary, but Stark had soon realized that Booth was ignoring him, disregarding the possible repercussions. Booth was playing a game he couldn't win and Stark wanted Brennan to know that. He was counting on her influence with her husband to win the day for them all.

She knew that Aubrey was willing to become Booth's partner, but so far he had been unable to get Booth to consider it. Finally Brennan knew that she would have to intervene or her husband was going to end up sitting behind his desk for the rest of his career, a fate that would likely destroy Booth's love of his job. She knew her husband needed purpose and he needed to do his job unimpeded. He was a fine investigator and to force him behind a desk would leave him doomed to misery and she knew that wasn't hyperbole, but fact. Brennan understood that even if Booth didn't.

Brennan had tried to prod Booth into accepting a partner other than her, but she was failing and she was growing frustrated with the situation. Time was running out and finally she felt she had no choice but to actively insist that Booth take on Aubrey as a partner. She had the proof that would allow Booth to go after Alan Spaziano as the murderer of Hutch Whitehouse and she would use that to force a change. Arriving at the Hoover she had tracked down Aubrey in the hallway just outside the break room and had gone over the proof he would need to confront Spaziano.

"Look, Dr. Brennan, Booth isn't going to allow me in the interrogation room and you know that." Aubrey had listened carefully to the scientific proof they needed, but he knew she was wasting her time. "He's going to insist that you go in with him."

"And normally I would at this phase of the investigation, but you need to be presented as an able partner to Booth in such a way that he won't be able to turn down your help." Brennan sighed. "I have given you all the information you need to help close the case. When we go down to the interrogation room, I will refuse to accompany Booth into the room and I will force him to use you. This will be your opportunity to show Booth what an asset you are . . . You have already done that as far as I am concerned, but Booth is being stubborn . . . well, it is actually more than that. It is actually his lack of trust in everyone here at the Hoover that is impeding his acceptance of you as his partner, but if you are successful in the interrogation room, it will make Booth see you in a new light. I hope I am being clear. This will most likely be your last opportunity to impress him, so you cannot fail."

Filled with a little angst, Aubrey heard Brennan out and knew she was right. The Deputy Director had let him know he wanted Booth to accept Aubrey as a partner soon or that opportunity would be lost. "Wow, no pressure."

He had spoken the words softly, but Brennan had heard them. "Everyone is under pressure in this situation, Agent Aubrey. Your career as well as Booth's career are in the balance right now and I know you know that. The Deputy Director confronted me in the parking garage about this situation and he was quite serious. Booth must accept you as his partner and very soon."

A small headache building up between his eyes, Aubrey grimly nodded his head. "Let's do this thing."

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Brennan knew her husband well. She had confronted him outside the interrogation room and had forced the issue about Aubrey and his partnership. "You can trust him, Booth. I know a good man when I see one. I picked you didn't I? I'll meet you at home." Her leaving the Hoover was part of her plan. She had told her husband that she had explained everything to Aubrey and if he wanted to close his case then he would have to relent and use the younger agent. She had removed herself from his proximity and she knew that would force Booth to accept the situation and it had. Her husband might be stubborn to the point of exasperation, but he could bend when he had too.

The one thing that still worried her was his refusal to go to church. She knew that Booth was still distrustful and that distrust had grown to include his faith. Just because she had forced Booth to accept Aubrey as his new partner didn't mean a complete victory. Brennan knew her husband well enough to understand that this was going to be a long campaign. He had been cruelly betrayed and that betrayal had almost destroyed him and everything he valued in the world. Booth wasn't going to change back to his old self with the snap of her fingers. He was going to fight her at every turn, but she was confident that over time, his distrust would lessen and he might regain his faith. At this point she didn't think the old Booth would ever return completely, but she felt that she could accept that. She had no choice. She loved him and she knew he loved her. That hadn't changed.

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Sunday arrived and Brennan had hoped that Booth would finally go to church, but he had gone for a run instead, returned to the house to shower, changed clothes and made breakfast. Sad that Booth wasn't in church where he needed to be, Brennan joined her husband and daughter in the kitchen for a late breakfast. "I thought you'd be in church, Booth. It's still not too late. You could go to the latter mass."

His back toward Brennan, Booth flipped a few pancakes onto a plate and with his emotions under control, he turned and handed her the plate. "Nah, I'm good." He had been unable to go to services ever since he had been attacked in his home and almost killed. He could have overcome that if he had been backed up by the FBI and the Justice Department, but they had believed the worst in him and thrown him in to prison. The first few weeks in prison, he had prayed every day for help. He had asked for divine intervention, but nothing had happened. In the past his prayers had been answered when he really needed them to be and he had assumed that they would be this time too. Once he was released into the general prison population, the abuse started at the hands of the inmates and the guards. It had grown steadily worse and more than once he had used the skills he had learned as a Ranger to save his own life. As his plight worsened he had realized that his prayers were going to be ignored. Unlike his rescue by his grandfather as a child and his fellow Rangers when he had been captured and made a prisoner of war, his fate seemed to be sealed and he was on his own. His faith was shattered and he wasn't sure he would ever get it back. He had done nothing wrong and yet he had been betrayed by those he had thought he could trust. "I'm tired, Bones. I'm just going to stay home, watch some games on TV, maybe read with Christine . . . I have those new books that I bought for her . . . you understand right?"

"Yes, I understand." Brennan recognized the excuses for what they were, but she couldn't very well call him a liar. "Perhaps you could go to mass tonight after you've rested."

He knew that Brennan was worried about the changes in his life, but those changes weren't his fault and he tried to be as patient as he could be. After all these changes in him weren't her fault either. "Nah, I'm good. I might go to bed early tonight."

Staring at the plate of pancakes, Brennan found her appetite to have disappeared, but she knew she would have to eat or Booth would become worried. Some parts of him might have changed, but that part of him hadn't. He was still protective of her and worried when she didn't eat. "Alright. These look delicious."

"Yeah, I bet you missed my pancakes while I was gone." Booth almost choked on the last word, but again, his imprisonment wasn't his wife's fault. She had actually saved him by getting him out of prison and he knew he probably owed her his life. "Um, eat up. How about some syrup?" He poured a little of the maple syrup on her pancakes before she could respond. "Good . . . right?"

She took a small bite and forced herself to smile. "Yes, delicious, thank you."

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Let me know what you think of my story. Thank you.


	3. Chapter 3

(The Psychic in the Soup)

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I really don't own Bones.

Ooooooooooooooooooo

She worried that her husband wasn't sleeping as much as he should. Booth had always been a restless sleeper, but this was more than that, much more. He barely slept five hours a night and Brennan worried about his health, both physical and mental. It wasn't unusual to find him in the living room, lying on the couch watching television in the early hours of the morning. Booth insisted he was getting enough sleep, but the dark smudges under his eyes contradicted his assurances.

"I'm fine." Booth lay where he was and continued to look at the television. "Go back to bed. I'm just going to watch this sports news for a little while."

"Booth, I haven't see you sleep through the night since you returned home." It was obvious to Brennan that Booth was trying to ignore his problem and it wasn't really helping him. "Perhaps you could talk to someone . . . perhaps me."

He knew she was worried about him, but Booth didn't know what to tell her. While he had been in prison, he had had a hard time sleeping. Prisons are very noisy and it was hard to sleep with the shouting, the crying and the chattering voices. More often than not a guard would come by and wake him up on purpose a few times during the night which had added to his sleep problems. Now that he was home, he found it hard to relax. The slightest sound woke him up and forced him to leave his bed. After he checked all of the windows and doors in the house to make sure they were still locked, he usually stayed in the living room so as not to wake Brennan. "I'm all right, Bones. I just need time . . . I just need to get used to being home." He paused and sat up, his attention momentarily diverted by his new surroundings. "This house . . . I need to get used to this house . . . don't get me wrong, Bones. It's a wonderful house, really, but it's . . . it's not the house I left and I just need to . . . "

Truthfully, he didn't know what he needed. His life had been turned upside down. He had been kept from his family for three months. His little girl had cried so much the day he came home that he thought she was going to shake apart. It was hard to forgive the people who had destroyed his daughter's security and when Sweets had been murdered shortly afterward it seemed like his life would never be the same. He did know that if it wasn't for Brennan his life would be over and he was grateful that she was in his corner. She had helped him at great risk to her own freedom and he wanted to be the man she wanted him to be, he just wasn't sure if he knew where that man was. "It's okay, Bones, it really is. I'm home with you and Christine. I have my old job back and I have a new partner . . . I'll adjust. It'll be fine."

As Brennan listened to Booth she knew that he was struggling, but she didn't really know how to help him. "Come back to bed. Perhaps if you close your eyes you can at least rest. Watching television will ensure that you get no rest at all. You're tired Booth."

Since he knew that she wouldn't go back to bed until he did. Booth turned off the television and followed her back into the bedroom. Once he was lying next to her, he stared at the ceiling and watched the shadows move in odd patterns wishing that his life wasn't so messed up.

Lying next to her husband, listening to his quiet breathing, Brennan thought about all of the horrors they had both been through for the last four months and tried to come up with a plan to help Booth. Since Sweets wasn't available to give her some much needed advice, Brennan knew that she would have to find a way to defuse Booth's anxiety, his anger and his distrust. For now, she needed to find a way to get him to go back to church and to his Gambler's Anonymous Meetings. Those organizations had always given him a sense of stability and the rejection of his faith and in his support system made him vulnerable to weaknesses that Booth had so little control over. She feared that if he didn't return to the church, he would lose his connection to his religion and his faith was a big part of who Booth was. His belief in God and redemption helped him with his gambling addiction and his new lack of faith could allow him to gamble again. At the moment, he appeared to have no inclination to go back to gambling, but she was afraid that he might give in to his addiction if he continued to isolate himself. She remembered what had happened to her former intern Zach Addy when he chose isolation and Brennan was afraid that Booth was walking down a path that might lead to disaster, leaving her and their child behind.

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The weeks had gone by and Booth had started to sleep for longer periods of time, but he still managed to be up before the alarm clock rang out every morning. Brennan would awake, find the bed next to her empty and knew that her husband hadn't slept through the night again. After she dressed, she usually found him in the kitchen reading a newspaper, waiting for her and Christine to get up so he could begin to cook pancakes or French toast.

Occasionally, Booth would drive over to the park where Sweets' ashes had been scattered and sat on the picnic table where they had held the young man's wake. He often used that time to ponder about what he could have done to prevent his friend's death. He knew that Sweets had wanted to help him uncover the corruption surrounding them, but Booth blamed himself for putting his friend in harm's way. After an hour or so of silence, Booth usually stood up, faced away from the table and shoved his hands into his pants pockets. "I need a sign, Sweets. Are you okay? Are you happy? Just a little sign . . . please."

Of course, no sign ever came and he left the park, sad and feeling just a little bit empty.

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The case they were currently working on had come at a sad time for both Booth and Brennan. The 30th anniversary of Lance Sweets' birth had arrived and with it the pain of the young man's loss. Both Brennan and Booth missed their young friend and they thought of him often. Oddly, Avalon had made an appearance while they were investigating the death of a purported psychic named Justine Simmons which caused a bit of chaos. Since Brennan didn't believe in psychics, she felt that Avalon was a distraction at best. Booth tried not to believe in Avalon's abilities, but deep down he felt that there was something in what she said that made her somewhat believable. Usually Brennan gave him enough reasons to reject Avalon, but not completely.

When their case came to a close, Angela and Avalon had come to Booth and Brennan's home and presented the couple with a USB drive that had belonged to Sweets and a printed copy of the book that they had found on the drive. They had discovered that their departed friend had written a love story about his friends and both Avalon and Angela told them that Sweets had made sure they had found it.

Brennan had found it to be an odd coincidence that Angela had found the device, but her friend was adamant that it wasn't a coincidence at all. Sweets had sent Avalon messages about his book and with Angela's help they had rescued the USB drive and thus they were able to give Booth and Brennan a copy of the book on Sweets' birthday.

Once they were alone, Booth had started to read the book and with it a sense of peace settled upon him. He realized that his young friend had written about the love Booth and Brennan had for each other in a novel as his way to honor them. Sweets had wanted them to read his love story and he had sent signs to Avalon because she was the only one that could hear him. Though the novel was sweet, Booth knew he would only be able to read it once. He felt too emotional the whole time he read the book, but he felt it was his duty to read it for his friend's sake. To his surprise, he finished reading it in two days. "It's pretty good, Bones. He did a good job."

After she read the book, Brennan knew that with a little editing, she could get it published. She felt honor bound to make sure that Sweets' book was published and read by many people not just the couple he had written about. "It is good. Once he gave up on psychoanalyzing us, he was able to write a cogent story that captures the reader's imagination. It is very well done."

That evening, Brennan was surprised when Booth went to bed early. He slept peacefully during the night and was awakened by the alarm clock the next morning. Something that hadn't happened since the morning he had been attacked in their Mighty Hut. She knew that Booth was still struggling and he wasn't the man he had been before his betrayal, but he was also not the angry man he had become while he suffered in prison. She had hope that he could continue to find the peace he needed and that he would soon find a way to forgive the evil done to him.

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Let me know what you think of my story. Thank you.


	4. Chapter 4

(The Murder in the Middle East - The Life in the Light)

Thank you for reviewing my story. I appreciate it.

I don't own Bones.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

To find out that Booth had been secretly gambling behind her back hadn't been the shock it should have been. He had given up going to his Gambler's Anonymous Meetings after he returned home from prison and he had never gone back. He said he didn't need them, but Brennan had known that Booth was playing with combustible items. He was still not attending church and without GA and the church he didn't have anything to prevent him from falling off the proverbial wagon.

She knew that his fall from sobriety must have occurred when he had gone undercover to find the murderer of a gambler. She had dreaded him taking that assignment, but he had made it about trust and she had wanted to support him. Now she knew that he had been gambling for at last two months and he was so far in debt his bookie was threatening her to get the money her husband owed him. She was both livid that Booth would jeopardize his family and sad that he was not strong enough to keep his addiction at bay.

She knew that he needed a shock to his system and the only thing she could think of was to kick him out of their house. She had a child to protect and if he continued to gamble there was no guarantee that someone else might not turn up seeking more money for Booth's debts. She had to separate him from his family and she would not allow him to return until she saw signs that she could trust him. She knew it was going to be difficult for all of them, but she had to be strong. She loved him and she hoped she didn't lose him by forcing him to make a choice.

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As far as she was concerned, he was being stubborn. That was the only word Brennan could use to describe Booth's behavior. Much to her annoyance he continued to claim he had made a mistake not understanding that what he had done was more than a mistake. Her husband and friend had betrayed her by jeopardizing her and Christine. Jimmy, Booth's bookie had made thinly veiled threats that if he didn't get his money he would come around and she wouldn't like the stress since she was pregnant. She took that threat seriously and paid him off. That had been a dangerous situation and clearly not a mistake. It made her angry that her husband couldn't see that it had been more than a mistake, much more.

The lack of responsibility was a major concern to Brennan. In the past, she could count on Booth to do the right thing, to take responsibility for whatever deeds he had done, but his lack of trust in people and institutions was delaying his recovery. She knew that he was going to his GA meetings, but clearly he wasn't following the tenets of the organization. He was supposed to accept responsibility for his problems as part of the twelve step program, but as far as she could tell he hadn't completed step one which was admitting he was powerless over gambling and that his life was unmanageable. If he had taken the first step then she knew he would could move on to step two which was to believe that a power greater than him could restore him to his normal life.

That was the rub, he wasn't speaking to God and Brennan knew that as long as Booth denied his faith he would keep denying that his problem was serious. Since she wasn't a person of faith, she didn't know how to make him realize that he needed to communicate with his God. GA had worked in the past because Booth believed in a higher being that he could call upon to give him strength when he needed it. Without his faith GA would not work for him.

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Brennan wasn't sure what changed, but she noticed that her husband seemed to be calmer. He was visiting her and Christine on a regular basis and looking after their daughter when she had to work late. She had promised herself from the beginning that she would never separate him from their daughter. She has always hated the fact that Rebecca thought it was alright to keep Parker away from Booth when it was in her self-interests. She used his visitations rights to blackmail Booth sometimes and even now, the teenager was living in England because Rebecca had taken a new job there with little thought about how it would affect Booth. She knew that her husband loved his children and he would die for them. If there was an incentive to help him fix his gambling problem, it was that he was allowed to see his daughter and was reminded that he could lose that privilege if he let bookies threaten his family one more time. Booth still valued his family more than his own life and hopefully more than his love of gambling.

Their interactions continued to be awkward and Brennan was sure it was because Booth wasn't sure what he was allowed to do in her presence. She hated that there was a line between them, but the only one that could erase that line was Booth. She encouraged him as much as possible and reminded him from time to time that she loved him, but it was up to him to fix his problem and until he did, their relationship was going to be constrained.

During their separation, Brennan was assured continuously by Wendell and Aubrey that Booth was going to his GA meetings regularly and as far as they could tell, he was doing alright. Clearly, Booth was being watched over by his friends, but she wasn't sure if he was aware of that or not. It gave her peace of mind that she wasn't the only one that was concerned about his well-being and that others were monitoring his actions as well.

Though Aubrey was a new member of their little group, he took it upon himself to keep tabs on both Booth and Brennan. Though she missed Sweets, Brennan appreciated the kindnesses that the younger agent showed her and Christine. He was becoming a good friend of Booth's and that meant that Booth wasn't too isolated. Her husband needed connections even if he didn't think so.

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A month had passed and Booth appeared to be making progress. Though she had seen no signs that Booth was going to church, she was seeing signs that he was more involved in his GA meetings. He seemed to be taking his meetings seriously and seemed anxious when he might miss one. She felt that to be very encouraging.

Surprisingly, one day, he asked her to go to church with him. She almost cried with relief, but controlled her emotions and agreed to go with him. Her disbelief in a higher being was her personal choice and she was certain that once someone dies, there was just darkness, a nothingness. That was neither good nor bad, it just was.

The fact that Booth was a religious man that counted on God loving him and accepting him, made his decision to go back to church a major event. Brennan was now certain that Booth had forgiven God for letting the things that happened to him happen and he was willing to move on with his life.

The church her husband attended was one of the older churches in town. After the service, Booth took confession and then joined Brennan near the back of the church. "It's been a while, I had a few things to say."

Grasping his hand, Brennan squeezed it gently. "Does this mean you will be returning to church on a regular schedule?"

"Yeah, I think so . . . I think I'm ready." Even though he loved God, he had been upset with him for a long time. It had taken the death of the cookie jar addict to open his eyes. Her daughter had felt that her mother had never loved her because of her mother's addiction and that had made Booth see clearly what was going on in his own life. "My Dad was an alcoholic, Jared the same . . . I had a crappy childhood and I never want my children to go through that. No one should go through that . . . There's no cure for what's wrong for me. It's just going to be a constant battle for the rest of my life, but it's a fight worth fighting. I love you and the kids and the little tiger on the way and I want to be the husband you deserve, the father my kids deserve. I hope I never slip . . ."

"You won't, Booth. You know what would happen . . . Our children must be safe. Do you understand?" Brennan was trying to tell him as gently, but as firmly as she could that he had been given his chance and he shouldn't throw it away.

Slowly nodding his head, Booth stared into her bright blue eyes and knew what she was telling him. "Yeah, I understand. My family means a lot to me, Bones. I need you and the kids. I don't want to live without you."

Moving closer to him, she kissed him gently on the lips. "You are working hard and I trust that you won't fail." Stepping away from him, Brennan smiled. "I need to go back to work, will you pick Christine up from daycare this evening and take her home? I won't be too late."

"Yeah, sure." Booth knew he was still not allowed to return home permanently but he was working on that. "I have two new books I bought her last night. They're in my car."

"That sounds wonderful, Booth. I'm sure she will enjoy them."

Oooooooooooooooooooo

There comes a time, when enough is enough. Booth had done all that he could do to show Brennan that she could trust him and now it was up to her to decide what to do about him. She feared what would happen if he failed, if he gambled again, but that fear would always be in the back of her mind. Trust was the issue and after taking in all of the evidence, she decided that he needed to come home. He needed the support of his family. He had lived without them for several weeks and he knew that there would be no more chances.

They made love that evening. Being eight months pregnant had made that rather awkward, but they had managed and both were satisfied. "I missed you Booth."

"I missed you too. Believe me, I missed you and Christine and our routines." Booth lay in bed looking at the ceiling. "You were right. I should have never gone undercover. There was too much crap going on in my head . . . I should have listened to you and Aubrey, but at the time, I thought I could handle it. I . . . I screwed up."

"I take no pleasure in being right, Booth." Brennan was propped up on some pillows trying to find a comfortable position to lay. "There are some things that we can't do. You can't gamble and I can't find a comfortable position to sleep in . . . I'm sorry, I'm not making light of your addiction. I really will be glad when the baby decides to make an appearance. I have been through this twice and I find the last few months to be very uncomfortable."

Moving off the bed, Booth retrieved some pillows from the closet and while Brennan lay on her left side, he placed some pillows along her back and one under her stomach.

The relief was instant and Brennan appreciated it. "Thank you. I feel more comfortable."

Laying back down, Booth turned on his side and faced her. "Hey, I'm home now and if you need anything you let me know."

Grateful to her have her husband back in her bed, Brennan smiled. "Welcome home, Booth."

"Thanks Bones." He stared at his wife and asked himself how he got to be so lucky. He had caused her a lot of pain, but he would try to never do that again. He wasn't his father or his brother. He wanted to keep his addiction under control for him and for his family. He would always be a gambling addict and he would always have to fight to keep himself sober. "I love you."

"And I love you too, Booth."

Ooooooooooooooooooooooo

Let me know what you thought of my story. Thanks.


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